Category Archives: review

The Disappointing Penny Dreadful Finale

Posted on by
2

Penny Dreadful ended its three season run this past weekend…wait for it…dreadfully. After much gnashing of teeth, I decided the only way to exorcise my despair was to hash it out in a blog post. Spoilers ahead.

Let’s start at the beginning. When I first heard about a new show which was to bring together Victorian monsters and actors like Eva Green, Timothy Dalton, and Josh Hartnett, I fist pumped my joy. Green played Vanessa Ives, a tormented woman living with her surrogate father, Sir Malcolm Murray, played by Dalton. They were joined by Hartnett as Ethan Chandler, a mysterious gun toting man from the wilds of the American West, Harry Treadaway as Victor Frankenstein, and Rory Kinnear as Frankenstein’s monster. Later Dorian Gray and the bride of Frankenstein would join the crew, but the story was always about Vanessa and her struggle with darkness.

In Season One, the gang came together to fight vampires that abducted and turned Sir Malcolm’s daughter Mina. Vanessa felt responsible for her best friend’s fate as she, in a moment of weakness, allowed her “demons” to take control, and she seduced Mina’s fiancé. Through the battle with evil, each character had moments to demonstrate how they battled their own inner monsters, literally (Ethan was a werewolf) and figuratively against a sometimes lurid, gorgeous, gothic backdrop of Victorian London.

Season Two delved deeper into each character and brought us truly sublime episodes like when we glimpsed Vanessa’s time spent with a witch (Patti LuPone) years back. In this episode, we learned, as did Vanessa, more about her power and oh how awesome it was. She displayed her strength which came into play when she defeated Satan himself in the season finale. We also learned more about how Ethan was “Lupus Dei” or God’s wolf and much was made of his role in defeating the forces of evil. And the show finally succumbed to the awesome chemistry between Eva Green and Josh Hartnett in the wonderful episode where Ethan traveled with Vanessa to the witch hut and they walked the moors, Ethan wore chunky sweaters, and they fell in love. The show gave us so many wonderful moments: Vanessa and Ethan, Vanessa and Frankenstein’s monster, the mournful Victor, and weird, sexy if pointless Dorian Gray. The show’s strength lay in the moments in which the characters interacted so what did they do in Season Three? Give us more sexy Vanessa and Ethan? Explain Dorian’s purpose to the story? Explain what exactly was Vanessa’s power? No! Instead they kept our monstrous heroes separated until the…wait…not season finale, but series finale.

But I’m jumping ahead in my condemnation. Vanessa, our strong, sometimes fearsome heroine who defeated the Prince of Darkness using mad demonic rapping skills, who successfully fought off the dark forces inside her, and after finding out via Native American instant messaging, that her family was on their way to help her defeat Dracula himself, she gave in to Dracula. After two seasons of epic battle, she just gave in to Dracula. Series creator John Logan stripped away all the agency she fought for and gained and we only see Vanessa again when Ethan finds her and kills her. We got more screen time in the final two episodes with secondary characters and while I loved Renfield, for crissake, we get meandering with secondary characters and no satisfying Vanessa/Ethan or Vanessa/Malcolm.

But okay, let’s go there. Vanessa goes all evil because surely we’ll get an epic showdown between Vanessa and Dracula or Ethan, God’s wolf, and Dracula, right? No! Instead we get the Scooby gang facing off against the vampire hordes with guns. Since when did guns work against vampires and what was the point of Ethan’s wolfman? Even Twilight used their wolves better! And not only was there no epic battle with Dracula, he didn’t chase after Ethan when Ethan went after Vanessa, and when Ethan showed up carrying our dead heroine, Dracula simply shadowed away. Gone. Poof. Completely ineffectual and anti-climactic and speaking of… Season Three introduced some intriguing new characters in Cat and Dr. Jekyll but alas we got no idea what Cat’s purpose was and no Mr. Hyde.

It’s possible Showtime pulled the rug out from under the show mid season, but John Logan said the series ended as he had planned. If that’s the case, then he did the show’s fans and his characters a great injustice. One of my biggest gripes about shows is when the writers build up a conflict without resolving it. Dexter did it. Dexter’s colleagues in the Miami police should have discovered he was the killer. Victor’s friends should have discovered he revived the dead especially given the connection between Vanessa and his monster. But no. We are left with a heroine who did not go down fighting, flailing loose ends, massively under developed secondary characters, and no sex between Ethan and Vanessa. Sigh. Adios, Penny Dreadful. We barely knew you.

Black Sails Episode XIV

Posted on by
Reply

Episode XIV raised the stakes in every way. I just loved it. The many intricate webs became even more tangled. Flint is juggling many flaming balls. It’s enough to drive one mad, unless you already are mad. So how did our scurvy crew do?

“Who shits for an hour?”

“I do.” Oh, Mr. Logan, I remember when you expressed concern for Billy Bones’s neglected cock in Season One, but when you charged off to the brothel against the wishes of crew and captain, I knew you were not long for this world.

Long John slithers his way out of yet another flogging or keelhauling. Silver missed his calling as a campaign manager. Anyway, Silver has to be nervous about the beloved Billy’s return, but it strengthens the epoxy of distrust binding him and Flint. Yet, Silver ain’t taking no chances. I just wonder how the secret between him and Max will play out.

Number of Flint sneers. We got some bloody sneers. Not only did Flint sneer at Hornigold, but he gave him some pretty obvious eye rolls.

Screen Shot 2015-03-01 at 9.01.56 AM Screen Shot 2015-03-01 at 9.02.14 AM

I’d sneer at Hornigold too. My fort! My fort! My little piece of turf. Can you dig it people! (Historical Spoiler: When the Brits eventually do take back control of Nassau, Hornigold takes a pardon from the new governor and serves as his pirate hunter. ‘Es a bilge rat, that one.)

Flint is brilliant, delusional, or downright scaring the crap out of me. So, after some initial confusion from Episode XIII shockers, I believe he’s bi-sexual, and truly cares for Miranda. Seeing him and Miranda together now, after all the flashbacks, makes their present scenes just crackle. Flint seemed to come to terms with his past and present and asked Miranda if she’ll take him back, and they agreed to be partners.

On deck shenanigans. The parts involving Rackham and his need to prove himself to his crew were some of the best of the episode. Much was riding on this one prize and he knew it. When Jack and rival pirate captain, er, Linus, er Charles Manson, sat down to divvy up the spoils, I half expected them to break out the tea. It was a great moment showing another side to piracy not seen in stuff like Pirates of the Caribbean. I was however, waiting for someone to draw a cutlass. Sure enough, our cutthroats didn’t disappoint. Rackham’s no Charles Vane, but our man Jack has his own strengths and after he killed Manson, he freed the merchant crew so they could help fight the other pirate crew. And when Jack asked who would join him…the goat was the first to step up. This goat wants its rights attended to. No fucking goats on this crew.Screen Shot 2015-03-01 at 9.13.16 AM

Wenches behaving bad-ass-ly. Anne Bonny on the rampage. So yeah, Mr. Logan’s dick got the better of him. Anne is getting herself more and more entangled in Max’s thighs. And honestly, I’m getting a little annoyed with our Anne. Jack did not betray her. His crew voted on the articles, and, if he is to be their captain, he has to respect what the men voted on. She’s a pirate and she knows this! I believe we are going to get some Anne back story so maybe we’ll see some traumatic shit that will explain her psychotic episodes, or we can just chalk it up to Anne’s dark and wild “it”.

Aaah! What is Eleanor thinking??!! Sigh.

Pirate history check. Vane doesn’t care about legitimacy, but he knows once London gets control of Nassau, the pirates will be driven out. And he’s right. I loved some of his lines to Eleanor: “When I take something from a man…I don’t hide behind the law.” He’ll die before becoming another man’s slave again. This is the Vane we know from history or a fictional semblance of him. When pardons are finally offered to the pirates, Vane wants nothing to do with it and becomes a de facto leader of the more hard core pirates. With forces closing in on him, he escapes New Providence, literally guns blazing.

Episode MBP (most badass pirate). In the last recap I wrote that I was going to give it to whomever wins the fight between Vane and Flint. Gosh darn it Eleanor! Bad form interrupting a good brawl. Now whom do I choose? Sigh. We know who Eleanor chose. As much as I like the push and pull between Vane and Eleanor, how their passion drives them together and their loyalties and agendas drive them apart, the new wedge between them saddens me. The chemistry between those two is great. Oh, yeah, badass pirate. My man Jack, all the way. And his first mate or quartermaster? Who is that guy? He’s awesome too. He had to tell Jack the hard truth over why the men chose him as captain, not for his bad-assery, but because of Max’s intel.

Billy Bones, Billy Bones is our true hero. It was so nice to see Billy welcomed back by his crew. He informed them the British Navy is camped close by. How did he get away, they ask? Oh, the captain wasn’t looking and I tore off the shrinking leather, broke the chains that bind, and…oh…so yikes! The Brits are coming folks and they want Flint’s head on a stake and Billy and some of his pardoned merry men will ride off into the sunset. Because that’s about as likely to happen as Flint and Eleanor’s vision for Nassau.

Jack Rackham quote to Manson, er, rival pirate about his ship, the Goliath: “Your ship is named after the greatest disappointment in the history of warfare?”

Too many scuttle butts to count. Great episode!

Black Sails Episode XIII recap

Posted on by
Reply

I missed posting an Episode XII recap, but mostly our beloved cutthroats were moving chess pieces around before the fireworks began, and Episode XIII certainly delivered in more ways than one. So Flint’s deal is all about honoring his love for Miranda’s husband, Thomas, or dismissing his shame? It certainly brings a new and interesting element to Miranda’s relationship with Flint. The writers had us believing, at first, that Miranda was concerned about the repercussions of her affair with Flint, and I’m thinking, heck, lots of upper crusty Brits had affairs, but ah…no…we’s talking about the “profane” (according to Thomas’s dad) affair between Flint and Thomas. Apparently homosexual affairs led to hangings and imprisonment in the nasty Bedlam, where they probably tried to freeze or lobotomize the gay-ness right out. Poor Thomas.

I wonder how our pirates and Eleanor will feel if they ever discover Flint wants to turn New Providence into some utopian British society in honor of his lover…and not for pirate principals. Anyway, aside from forbidden love, this episode was all about the threesomes, starting with the opening scene.

Long John slithers his way out of yet another flogging or keelhauling. Billy Bones, like Flint, sees through Silver’s bs. The little power play between the two definitely set up some interesting dynamics for the future. Billy has come back from the dead a new man and he ain’t taking shit from anyone, and Randall likes him too, by god. (Although I have some reservations about Billy’s motives, but more on that later.)

Some of the exchanges between our threesome were priceless:

Silver: “I’m a hard man not to like.”

Randall: “We like him.”

Billy: “You are very dangerous or very stupid.”

Silver: “Possibly a bit of both.”

And when Silver contemplates offing Billy, Randall intervenes and warns Silver off: “We like him, too.”

Randall, the master of the understatement.

Number of Flint sneers. Folks, we may have seen the birth of the Flint sneer, over Miranda’s shoulder after they took Thomas away to Bedlam, which btw, was a pretty terrible place.

Flint is brilliant, delusional, or downright scaring the crap out of me. So all of this is because Flint is ashamed of his love for Thomas? Pissed he didn’t do more to save Thomas? This episode was key to revealing Flint’s psyche and while I’m still not convinced he isn’t completely mad, we see, at least he’s doing it for lurv.

Wenches behaving bad-ass-ly. This episode made me feel for Miranda and her plight. She wasn’t Thomas’ truest love and probably not Flint’s either. And in the end, Flint tells her he was ashamed that he listened to her instead of doing more to save Thomas. Ouch! But what? Storm Bedlam? Miranda was certainly the rationale one in that threesome.

This leads us to our final threesome of the episode. In Episode XII, Anne told Jack she wanted him to make sure Max didn’t get in between them, but really it’s too late and, I’m not sympathizing with Anne here. She gets pissed when Jack tells her the crew voted her out of a share, but Jack is behaving perfectly rational for a pirate captain and Anne should understand this. (Also, I have a hard time swallowing how a pirate crew would split shares with a brothel Madame and former prostitute no matter how much good Intel she’s bringing in.)

Pirate history check. So we got the big shocker this episode, but did pirates have sex on those long voyages? Granted Flint was not a pirate when he engaged in his extra-marital-male affair, but a technicality. Some of the 17th Century buccaneers practiced what was called, matelotage, a type of social structure where two men shared property which may have extended to sexual relations. However, there is nothing in the records that outright state pirates had sexual relations among themselves, and I imagine, if it occurred, it was along the lines of “don’t ask, don’t tell”.

Episode MBP (most badass pirate). I’m going to give it to whomever wins the fight between Vane and Flint.

Billy Bones, Billy Bones is our true hero. So how did Billy Bones make it back to New Providence? He posed this very question to Silver, told him maybe he should be more concerned over what took him (Billy) out of the drink (after Flint most likely tossed him in). I had this very same question when he popped up on New Providence in Episode XII. Somehow Billy escaped from the shrinking leather? Me don’t think so. Our Billy Bones may turn out to be a double dealing knave.

Jack Rackham quote. I quite enjoyed see the prostitute sketching what would become Calico Jack Rackham’s flag, and the classic death’s head, pictured below, and Rackham’s subsequent line: “We all have the same swords, we all have the same guns, but great art has felled empires.”

090413-calico-jack-flag-02

Ten blow my scuttlebutts for “profane” love, three threesomes, and great art.

Black Sails Episode XI recap

Posted on by
Reply

So many exiting things happened this episode and they left us with Flint ready to fire upon Vane in the fort. I can’t stand it. So until then…

Long John slithers his way out of yet another flogging or keelhauling. Silver was pretty quiet this episode because of the focus on Vane, Flint’s return to New Providence, and more beheadings, but he did manage to convince Flint’s crew to forgo the vote on whether or not to go carousing on New Providence. Silver explained how sailing into the bay with Spanish markings on their canvas was maybe not such a wise idea.

Number of Flint sneers. One managed to sneak out when he was berating Eleanor for acquiescing to Vane. I believe Miranda might have sneered at Eleanor as well.

Flint is brilliant, delusional, or downright scaring the crap out of me. We learn he can be downright romantic. He leaves a book for Miranda with the words “I’m sorry” written on the inside cover. We learn their affair began over a Spanish copy of Don Quixote. Our sociopath is quite the man of letters. Not quite so romantic, however, when the New Providence pirates learned about Gate’s untimely demise. (Flint’s quartermaster who he killed in the first season.) Eleanor was pretty freaked out when she found out Flint had killed Gates. The pirates hold fine lines between brutality and outright evil fuckery and killing one of your own crew without justification falls into the evil f&%$# category as we learned after Anne Bonny and Jack killed members of their own crew.

Wenches behaving bad-ass-ly. Eleanor tried to get the upper hand on Miranda, calling her too unremarkable to warrant a mention from Flint, but Miranda has years of high-handed, British upper-class bitchiness under her belt and hands Eleanor her ass. Miranda knows what Flint’s demons whisper at night. I’d personally like to know what the both of them are smoking on that island, what local jimson weed causes one’s inner demons to whisper.

Miranda was quite the saucy wench. She basically seduced Flint back in London, showing up at his tidy apartment with very untidy thoughts. Back when women had little power, I hand it to those who took what they could, when they could. I especially liked when she told Flint about the whispers over her infidelities and how they didn’t bother her or her husband. Sooo, is she implying she has an open relationship with hubby? Or that hubby is oblivious? Time will only tell. Adding the flashbacks to Flint and Miranda’s past haven’t broken up the pacing at all and have only added more depth to these characters.

On deck shenanigans.

Screen Shot 2015-02-08 at 8.41.08 AM

Vane’s crew of natty dreads pictured above (these guys are impressive in their natty-ness) carried out quite the efficient suprizal, sneaking aboard New Low’s ship and taking out the crew. It was quite satisfying when Low called out for Mr. Holmes after he gave Vane some shade about having to come to his ship alone because his crew don’t respect him no more. Mr. Holmes don’t work here anymore. Boo yah! Well played Vane.

Pirate history check. When Vane shows Eleanor Ned Low’s hostage, Eleanor tells him how Peter Ash, the Carolinas governor…(I’m a bit confused at the Carolinas lumping here because I believe both North and South Carolina were split into separate colonies in 1712) Anyway, Ash had hung men he even suspected of piracy. It was actually pretty difficult for a colonial governor to try a man for piracy. Governors needed permission from the king to hold a piracy trial under their own authority. Piracy trials were under the jurisdiction of the Vice Admiralty so most pirates had to be shipped off to London. (This legal loophole was later resolved by legislators in London.) Some governors claimed the ability to act as representatives of the Vice Admiralty, but that was a stretch. In fact, Governor Spotswood of Virginia tried William Howard, one of Blackbeard’s quartermasters. Howard actually had a lawyer and called upon him, but through some legal shenanigans on Spotswood’s part, his lawyer was banned from the trial. Spotswood tried and convicted Howard, but later he was released as a result of a pardon. (From Blackbeard by Angus Konstam)

Episode MBP (most badass pirate).

Black Sails, episode XI, Charles Vane

Vane has quite the flowery script, he does. Writing in blood must inspire the inner calligrapher, at least I’m thinking that was his ink of choice.

I’m sad to see Ned Low go even though it appears he existed to serve as a plot device, but we have Vane to give us the occasional beheading and savage reprisal when needed. Early in the episode, Low told Vane how he was an irrational blunt instrument with an instinct toward the extreme. Episode X, we learned how Flint has a dark, wild “it”. So while Low and Flint are ruled by their “its”, Vane appears to be more rational and calculating in handling his “it” or blunt instrument, unless Eleanor’s involved. His “it” tends to get pretty fired up then. In fact, the romance writer in me has a theory about Vane, especially after Max asked him if he wanted to know how she stopped caring about Eleanor, and he responded with a very firm negative. Last season, Vane told the story of how Eleanor used to sneak out to the beach and flaunt her little, 13 year-old self in front of the pirates, casting demure smiles that said, I own you. Well, one of those smiles stuck on Vane. It’s possible Vane holds on to his affection for Eleanor to keep him from going full on Ned Low psycho. Whatever the reason, ‘tis very intriguing.

Billy Bones, Billy Bones is our true hero. We didn’t see him get more tortured, thankfully. But I did come across an interview with Tom Hooper, who plays Billy, and he provides some interesting insights into what is coming for our Billy. http://www.tvguide.com/news/black-sails-billy-dead-1079026/

Jack Rackham quote. To Anne Bonny, “She [Max] knows how to play the thing between your legs better than I.” I called the threesome! Starz didn’t disappoint. Max got Vane to do some public displays of affection so Jack and Anne could return to piracy. I enjoyed the scene in which Jack and Anne lovingly discussed building their own crew, acquiring a piragua. I wonder, ultimately, what Max’s stake is in all this. Is she really that into Anne?

So Vane now has Low’s prized plunder in his possession, the daughter of Governor Peter Ash of the Carolinas. Anyway, we glimpsed Charleston (Charles Town at the time), South Carolina in the season teasers. My second pirate book is partly set in the Carolinas around this time, so I’m excited to see Charles Town portrayed.

Eight blow my scuttlebutts because plot device Ned Low is gone, but overall awesomeness!

Black Sails Episode X

Posted on by
Reply

Episode IX left me wondering: How will Flint take back his command? Will Vane blast him out of the water when he returns to New Providence? Whose lips will Ned Low remove? Why don’t they name each episode?

We got some answers to these pressing questions, but not to the show’s Roman numeral naming convention. A good name for episode X would have been Don’t Fuck the Dairy Goat. But more on that later. The pacing this season has been breath-stealing. Many major plot issues were resolved in this episode. I thought they’d make us wait until mid-season to see Billy Bones. Squee! But I suspect the pirates have many more heads to sever with a rusty cutlass and they really can’t waste time on trivial matters.

I was worried about Mr. Meeks. I didn’t think he was going to last the episode. I couldn’t tear my eyes from his lips. (See previous review with background on real life pirate, Edward Low)

Long John slithers his way out of yet another flogging or keelhauling. Silver suffered quite a bit while trying to make Flint’s former crew turn against each other, but he didn’t let a few well-thrown punches deter him. He learned in the orphanage that it’s not about getting others to like you, it’s reminding others how much they dislike each other. We also learned Silver didn’t want to be a pirate. Sadly, his destiny is set, and, as his Treasure Island future self said, “Them dat die ‘ill be the lucky ones”.

Number of Flint sneers. He was sneer-less, not even after giving the order to fire and stealing Dufresne’s thunder. In fact, I believe the British aristocrat officers in the London tavern scene threw a few sneers Flint’s way.

Flint is brilliant, delusional, or downright scaring the crap out of me. I loved the lines from Flint’s Commodore or Admiral in the London flashback. (Don’t really know what his commander’s rank was.) Anyway, after Flint kicked British Lord butt in the tavern scene, his commander told him: “That thing which arises in you when passions are aroused. Good sense escapes you. All men have it, but yours is different. Darker. Wilder. I imagine it’s what makes you so effective as an officer. But when exposed to extremes, I could not imagine what it is capable of.”

Dufresne knows what “it” is capable of. Dufresne, you about to get your butt whipped, and Flint, your manipulation is a wonder to behold. First, he stroked Dufresne’s ego, told him how he’d known the man of letters, Dufresne, would be a good addition to the crew. Then, for Dufresne’s own good, he gave him a piece of sage tactical advice. Don’t take the eastern route back to New Providence, and tempt the crew with a fat, merchant vessel out of Kingston. And, of course, what did Dufresne do? He sailed east and pursued a prize. Did Flint actually want Dufresne to not sail east to keep Dufresne from successfully capturing a prize, and look good in front of the crew? Or did he gamble on Dufresne not taking his advice, sailing east, taking a prize, and failing miserably? I say the latter. Flint, yer a canny bastard. Flint orchestrated the death and destruction of his own crew to get his captaincy back. Is it possible a man could do such a thing, asks Dufresne? Why yes. Just ask Flint’s former commander about his dark and wild thing. Oh, and Miranda too.

Wenches behaving bad-ass-ly. Eleanor is in quite the pickle. Many factions are closing in on her. The newly formed Rackham, Max, and Anne triumvirate or threesome for one. Wonder when we’ll see that, eh, Starz? Add to that, Low’s frightening obsession with her. And what will Vane do? Anne seems genuinely torn between her passion for Max and obligations/feelings for Rackham. In historical records, Anne did sail off with Captain Calico Jack Rackham, along with Mary Read. When Rackham’s drunken crew encountered a privateer, who was hunting Calico Jack, they were easily subdued. Most of the pirates fled for the hold while Anne and Mary joined the fight to repel the privateers. Read called on the pirates to “come up and fight like men.” (from Daniel Defoe’s A General History of the Pirates)

On deck shenanigans. Pirate articles covered everything from prohibitions on gambling, share of spoils, and health insurance. Not sure I’ve come across a prohibition on beastiality. Flint’s crew forgot that one as well. But me thinks they’re going to add it now. Forget stealing food or wiping one’s arse with one’s hand. People, don’t fuck the dairy goat…or piss off the cook.

Pirate history check. Not really, but I’d like to make an appeal to restore one 18th Century tradition of starting meetings with the “Account of Goings On”. Volume the first, on this first day of February, in the year Two-thousand and fifteen. Weather is quite pleasant. Stomp feet. John was playing Candy Crush on his work computer. Jane was dozing in the break room. I think much office gossip could be deflated if we just aired the scuttlebutt from the get go.

Episode MBP (most badass pirate). While simply uttering Vane’s name kept a pirate from getting arrested, and while Flint is a master manipulator, Low wins out for sheer, gut-wrenching brutality. Bringing him on the show was a stroke of genius. The dude is unhinged. I was clenching my blanky in all of his scenes, wondering when the axe murderer in him was going to break loose. Loved it. And the actor who plays him is doing a great job. I bet he’s a really nice guy in real life, like the kid who played Joffrey Baratheon in Game of Thrones. Mr. Meeks, I knew you were not long for this world. Until Meeks’ head rolled, we didn’t see what Lowe was doing to him, but, oh, we heard it with sticky, wet, flesh-rending clarity.

Billy Bones, Billy Bones is our true hero. I knew it! Opening scene. But, why did they have to torture him? Pirates did some nasty things, oh no, that was the British Royal Navy, and the Spaniards, who came up with the foul technique employed by the Naval officer torturing our Billy. The Spaniards did concoct the Inquisition, after all. I’m pretty sure I’d take water boarding over being shrink-wrapped in leather and left on the beach to cook. I suppose the scenario was a combination of water boarding and death by leather.

Jack Rackham quotes. Jack was pretty subdued this episode. Actually he was pretty heart-breaking, as much as a pirate can be. So I have to hand over best quote to Randall, the cook. “I don’t like him.” Silver learned quite a bit from a man who barely speaks.

The first season got off to a slow start, spending the first few episodes establishing the characters. While the pacing was deliberate, it really paid off. Now, we have episode after episode of tense situations, and I’m invested in what will happen to each character, even the crazy bastards.

A full 10 out of 10 blow my scuttlebutts because, gosh darn it, Billy Bones is back! And for unmentionable acts with dairy goats.